Shut Up
IS IT CAUSE IM BLACK!? IT IS, ISN’T IT!
Aug 20th
Everyone's favourite crazy ass bitch Naomi Campbell has decided it's time to STAND UP for her lack of work, by claiming its because she's black. Roll eyes.
Supermodel Naomi Campbell has lambasted top fashion magazines for avoiding black models in favour of fair-skinned beauties. The London-born supermodel targeted Vogue in particular for its almost exclusive use of pale-skinned models."Black models are being sidelined by the major modelling agencies," Campbell said in an interview reported in The Times.
"It is a pity that people don't appreciate black beauty."….She now believes Vogue is reluctant to use black models. "Even myself, I get a raw deal from my own country in England," she said during interviews at Briatore’s hotel."Only white models, some of whom are not as prominent as I am, are put on splash pages. "I don't want to quit modelling until I find that black models get equal prominence and recognition by the world media and information instruments."
Naomi and Tyra should have buried the hatchet long ago because "The Tyra & Naomi Show" would quite possibly be the best thing on television. It'd basically be an hour of them dressing up as white people, and then crying about the difficulties they face as rich and fantastically good looking supermodels. It would close with them talking about how the world hates the blacks. That is what fat, middle-aged, white women want to see you know! Naomi thinks she's the new Harriet Tubman and she is going to emancipate those slaves of WHITE FASHION! Tyra needs to put her back in her place. A weave fight to be sure.
Naomi is also failing to realize that the reason no one wants her ass on their magazine covers is because she is getting old and fug and is basically a nightmare. Like, if I was a Vogue photographer, i'd dress a fucking duck in a D&G ensemble before i'd make the call for Naomi Campbell. Beside's, everyone would just think it was Lara Flynn Boyle. So unfortunate.
Pete gave them all handjobs!
Aug 15th
Fall Out Boy have spoken out about their SHOCKING HORRIFYING EXPERIENCE in Africa where they were held at ransom for money. Unfortunately, Pete Wentz survived, and typically enough is now talking about his traumatic African experience.
Bandmember Pete Wentz says, "There was one moment when I really feared for our lives. We were riding motorcycles and these local guys used barricades to lock us in this little patch of ground. They saw that we were American and thought that we should give them money for being on their ground. When they locked us in, I actually thought, 'We're going to die, right now.' Luckily we had our guide Kenny to bail us out and pay them off but that was really, really terrifying, living through something like that. It was a real Hotel Rwanda moment. The whole experience brought our band closer together and that's a great thing."
A real Hotel Rwanada moment. Oh yes, I can definitely see how Fall Out Boy being asked to give a small fraction of their underserved fortune to angry, poor African people is the same as a Don Cheadle movie about a mass genocide! Pete tinkled in his pants then went down on them all, they couldn't wait to get them a piece of the pretty American chick in the back! This is truth and is only printed on the internet. Pete just introduced a new STD to Africa.
Can Teri Hatcher send me back my $5.
Aug 15th
I'd like to ask Teri Hatcher to cover the happy meal i just threw up. It was rather good considering the shit I usually eat from that hellhole, I am far from impressed. Teri Hatcher is now advertising Badgley Mishcka and I think she just remortgaged her house to pay for the airbrushing. Bitch needs to remortgage her face too with a power sander and a boat load of rubber glue!
Oh hallo thurr, I am Teri Hatcher and I appear to have dropped my youthful good looks into this fabulous and crystal swimming pool. Can u halp me find it?
She is definitely not Posh Beckham and should not try to make this happen because she will fail miserably and probably can't say MAHJAH.
Who the fuck lies on a couch like this!? Oh wait Teri Hatcher is mentally impaired. I shouldn't make fun of disabled people.
Here she is getting CRUNK with her gang bang buddies. Old grey on the right there has the biggest penis and I can guarantee that as fact!
I think Maddox has one of these baby monitors.
Aug 12th
A baby monitor picks up phone sex from a neighbour and the person on the other end is basically Borat. I fucking wish I lived here! I'd be jerking a little and laughing a lot.
He loves her sexee legs!
A nasty celebrity!? Don’t be so ridiculous!
Aug 7th
Actress Denise Richards is "disgusted" with ex-husband Charlie Sheen's plans to take her to court over parental rights of their two children, insisting he is simply acting out of spite. The Platoon star wants more relaxed visitation rights with his daughters Sam, three, and two-year-old Lola, as he is currently only allowed to spend time with them under supervision. But Richards is furious with the timing of Sheen's legal action.
She tells the New York Post's gossip column Page Six, "This is disgusting. He is doing this now because he's not happy with me and the custody arrangement. My mom is going through chemotherapy and I asked Charlie if my mom could see the kids before she got really sick. That's a valid request. He doesn't stick to the schedule he has with the kids – that's not my fault." Richards and Sheen divorced in November 2006 after a turbulent three-year marriage. The actor is now set to wed 29-year-old real estate investor Brooke Mueller.
Okay bitch first of all don't use your sick mom to garner public sympathy. That shit is about as cool as your film career. Which is not cool at all. Except for that classy movie Threesome you did. Secondly – didn't you write a scathing divorce paper in which you tried to expose Charlie Sheen as a nasty bisexual peadophile drunk? Yes, I believe you did.
So, are you really surprised that he hates you and is trying to make your life hell? Fuck bitch if theres anything you should be disgusted with it's the way you've handled this shit and/or a mirror. Denise Richards and her scary face need to find a big ass rock and just be under it at all times. This would be the best thing for the world.
Gwyneth Paltrow uses snake venom to stay evil.
Aug 6th
Gwyneth Paltrow uses snake venom ingredients in a mosturizer to help keep her face looking boring and stiff it has been claimed. She probably milks her very own snake fangs into a tub of lard and rubs that shit in.
The Oscar-winning actress swears by an anti-wrinkle skin cream made from serpent poison to keep her skin looking young and vibrant. Gwyneth is said to regularly visit the Beverly Hills Sonya Dakar Skin Clinic where she buys a wide range of Ultra Lux 9 products – including one cream which contains the venom.A source told the New York Post newspaper: "It's not Botox.""It is just a cream that has the venom of a snake in it. The cream is part of the facial treatments available at the spa."
I don't get why people keep referring to her as 'The Oscar winning actress' because I believe 'Skanktroll she-demon' is a more contemporary description. I wouldn't be surprised if she mosturizers her meaty lips with pure spider baby juice. Satan sends her a beauty basket once a month. God, I hate Gwyneth Paltrow. I liked Sliding Doors though. Probably just because of the different hairstyles and the Aqua song though. Don't judge me it was a gay year for me.
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