My new favourite thing in life, possibly ever, is Marion Cotillard proving that actually, yes, funnyordie.com is worth the terrabytes it uses with her ad for FOREHEAD TITTAES.

Okay Alina is not a tranny, but at nine feet twelve and a robot man-voice she might as well be. A ridiculously sexy tranny though. I would definitely cash my tranny goodwill in with this bitch.

Isn’t the Numa Numa shit a bit 2000-and-late? I’m fairly certain that once T.I did it it goes past prime.

And by that i mean her sweet dream is finally being exposed, a trifecta of Beyonces!

This is how she has always envisioned it, but due to the physical impossibilites behind it and many failed prototypes she has had to use Kelly and Michelle as standins instead.

The pic is from the new video from Beyonce’s Sweet Dreams, which looks like it cost about $14 to make. It’s on youtube but keeps getting yanked down by the label, so google that shit and cross your twanger and maybe she’ll appear to you like a beautiful nightmare.

The last six seconds of the video are like a hypnotic trance where Beyonce’s chest is doing the overtime.

Okay this really is turning into Britney Spears week, but what can I say, people love this trailer muffin. Britney’s new song should totally be Muffin Top.

Anywang, Britney is back in the headlines again after accusations that her Candies ads were *gasp* airbrushed. People were shocked! The world stopped turning! It turns out someone at Britney’s PR machine wanted the world to know otherwise and leaked the unairbrushed version to that douchebag PerezHilton.

Before

After

So now we know instead that makeup is mainly to blame for this, and she’s not a fatty boom boom. Clearly theres been lighting adjustments, a little tweaking on the hair, and her top has been pulled out and ass pulled in to make her look un-natural in her proportions and actually now you see the after it looks physically impossible.

We are pretty certain Candies put a big chunk towards the budget of the shitty ass Radar video, which would explain why it makes no sense for the song.

Thanks for promoting a ridiculous body image, Candies!

Spears performing hit 'Boys' on tour

Britney Spears brought her worldwide sell-out ‘I Get To Dance for Mah Baybees‘ tour (aka The Circus Tour) to Paris this weekend and France are best left in the dark about cheese grits, as im sure they’d be offended by the violation of dairy.

Anywhoo, Britney celebrated the new leg of her tour  with a sexy dark brown hairdo and a “I didn’t eat no muffins this munth y’all, i swear it!” body. She is also debuting a dance to her song ‘Mannequin‘ in the tour tonight according to her twitter.

Britney was brunette for the european dates of her last tour, 2004’s Onyx Hotel.

I prefer my trailer muffins blonde.

Thanks to Exhale for these great pictures.

Ugh. I know, I KNOW. Adrien Brody attends BOSS Orange’s fashion party and a small part of himself must admit he’s gay for that alone. I can only hope, since apparently i’m attracted to guys who look like they’ve been woken up by the sound of another hobo pissing on THEIR spot. I am not even going to begin to discuss that outfit, but suffice to say I’d hop on that train and honk it’s crookedy ass nose until the sun comes up!

Images: Just Jared

Britney Spears’ new song Radar is about a year and a half old now, but is still awesome. That said, the video had such potential to be a total navy themed vid. Britney on a boat, like Cher, except from the trailer park. Trailer-Cher if you will. Anyway Britney instead decided to go for the very popular and current theme of horses and polo for the video instead. And of course the video features Britney sitting a lot (yes, this IS an uptempo dance song) in slow-motion and then a horse shaking his money maker whilst being watered down, slowmo style, to the words “animal in the sack, think i can handle that!”

And yet im still okay with this, because it’s Britney.

C&A Building Plastics are responsible for some of the finest advertisments of our time. Unfortunately there is no ‘Baz Luhrman Presents’ at the start of the ads although im almost certain Baz was involved with these ads on some level. The ads were most likely by Saatchi & Saatchi and feature a glamorous natural blonde star of tomorrow, a modern day Bette Davis! Anne Hathaway should really watch her back because this girl is out for oscars if she puts in any more touching apperances like this.

Zachary Quinto struts around LA with his shoulders about four inches further back than the should be. Whenever i see Zachary Quinto walking i feel like he’s going to stop half way, round snap his fingers and shout “Hay gurl why you weave be so fabulous?” but unfortunately this is yet to happen. I will settle for him falling over his dog though and having a piss-fit about it all.

Oh and yeah, he’s being followed around by a giant steak and a butcher. He then helps his giant steak friend who manages to get stuck on the sidewalk in a bush.  I am not high enough for this.

The tranny break is over! No we didn’t announce it, but being addicted to crystal meth does make one go off the rails some what. That said, we’ve lezzed off with a dj, smashed a car in with an umbrella and had our vajayjay pictured a zillion times and we are ready for our comeback tour. This works out well since in blogging a comeback tour literally requires you to sit and eat Pringles infront of a computer. YAY for Pringles.