Boobs
Hot & Not
Jul 7th
Here's Amanda Bynes looking smokin at a Hairspray première. I feel for her having to be so close to Zac Efron for so long. I really hate that douche. Amanda is looking seriously hot these days. I approve much.
And now here's Beyonce looking like she's trying to hatch some sort of android from her womb. Of course desperately trying to keep her weave in place during this painful birthing process.
Girl got her freakum on for sure. Pat Yo Weave B!
The Defugging/Slutting of Jessica Simpson continues.
Jun 18th
Everyone knows Jessica Simpson would go down on a chihuahua if it got her half as much coverage as a Lindsay Lohan trailer or a Britney Spears fart, but lately Jessica Simpson has stopped with the attention seeking whore act, put on a little meat and now she's looking healthy, breasty and less ugly than the stick insect she was becoming. There must be a motive.
Best of all she's not fucking it all up by wearing ugly designer couture every time she steps out of her house. She's actually dressing as though she is laid back and we all know that this is not the truth because that ho totally freaked every time John Mayer mentioned anything apart from her album or her tits. But the illusion of her being cool and normal is better than the reality of her being selfish and skanky. So lets roll with this and see where it takes us. I actually quite like this ho.
image source: ontd.
A step in the right direction.
Apr 12th
Lindsay Lohan has, It would seem, finally discovered the popular support garment widely known as a bra, you can see this to be true from the image bellow of Lindsay Lohan showing us her bra.
Whilst the (i’m sure, revolutionary) discovery of a bra is probably a big deal for Lindsay Lohan, It’s also clear Miss Lohan expects a medal and perhaps a small ceremony for wearing a bra! Look at her there showing off her bra enhanced boobage proudly! I’d normally encourage this kind of slutty behaviour from hot Hollywood starlets, but when Lindsay Lohan started looking like my drunken aunt I stopped finding her sexy and started finding her, oh say, physically repulsive.
So as much as Lindsay Lohan’s misguided attempt to be erotic and sexy deserves a hat tip for effort, it’s still not going to be either erotic or sexy until she stops looking like a large leather sofa with furry pillows. Okay that actually is probably sexier than Lindsay Lohan and now I kind of want a furry pillow. I will jizz on it and tell people it’s paint.
Still hotter than Fergie
Apr 2nd
There’s no longer any debate as to wether Alanis Morisette has a penis or not, it’s widely known fact that she does have one after Ryan Reynolds nearly became her civil partner, but the question is how big is her schlong? I’m guessing 4 inches like a really big clit.
Here she is doing her own retarded not funny version of My Humps and to be honest my eyes would rather watch Hilary Clinton doing this even though my penis is quite enjoying it regardless. Look what you do to my MIND, Morisette!
Beyonce & Shakira are really quite hot.
Feb 28th
So in an attempt to boost the sales of her album B’Day, aside from hawking it to every man, woman and child in the world through the power of hypnotic overpromotion and thrusting, Beyonce decided to take a page from Shakira’s book and record a duet…with Shakira. See when Shakira’s Oral Fixation Vol.2 was serving up mediocre sales, her label hooked her up with a duet with Wyclef, and Hips Don’t Lie became the biggest worldwide hit of the decade. Oral Fixation was re-released and sales went through the roof.
Beyonce and her trash ass parents obviously thought doing the same would do good things for her Bidet. They are so right! Beyonce is the hotness and even though the ho is really annoying I would hit it repeatedly. Shakira is hot too even though she sounds much like a goat. I mean I love Shakiras music and stuff, but just because shes from South America does not mean she is allowed to sound like a mountain goat. Actually it totally does I forgot all South Americans sound like mountain goats, my bad.
Christina Aguilera does good.
Feb 23rd
Everyone who reads the Deli knows that beyond my recurring visions of her as the Little Pink Christina Aguilera Monster from South Park, Christina Aguilera serves very little purpose in my universe. Whilst I have listened to her boring, overlong, trash album Back to Basics, the only really good track from the album was Candyman, which she’s now released with a new music video.
Now considering I was certain Christina Aguilera was the devil for at least three years, I think the fact that I became mildly arroused by this music video speaks volumes for the leaps and bounds myself and Christina have made. But it took a lot of hard work, perseverance and my finger was never far from the mute button. http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-5679268705763767283
By the way, INCASE YOU DIDNT NOTICE, there are THREE different Christinas in that video. The TRL host told you to KEEP AN EYE OUT for that just incase it ESCAPED YOUR TINY MIND. I know it’s difficult to proccess as it was so not the entire point of the music video or anything, but the eagle eyed amongst us will catch the multiple Christina’s and we will feel smugly superior for it too!
Katherine McPhee’s breasts terrorize Boston
Feb 4th
I know Katherine McPhee is on the other side of the country right now, but you can never be too sure! Right, Boston!? Those breasts could be concealing any manner of fiendish terrorist activities! Time to safely detonate in a controlled manner.
Shania Twain is looking..very, very well.
Dec 4th
I don’t really know how old Shania Twain is, and to be perfectly honest, I don’t really care. This is one woman who I would turn necro for.
Salma Boobek.
Nov 23rd
Salma Hayek raises only one question with this magnificent image.
Salma, Why u tits so huge?
I know! She’s smuggling Mexicans over the border like Harriet Tubman! In other news I’m apparently becoming Michael Richards.
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