The Xenu Code

I don't know why but this picture of Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise is hot and reminds me of the Da Vinci Code. Except because they are scientologists the big secret is basically that its all a network for bearding gay actors. A dark secret that could shock the world no doubt.

Nancy Drew better seriously hitch up her burberry dress because Suri Cruise is going to solve this mystery and she is going to look at least 80 times more fabulous whilst doing it.

Suri Cruise and Violet Affleck should have playdates together, and they probably would've if Tom Cruise hadn't scared Jennifer Garner away with his big bag of crazy. You know Tom is trying desperately to arrange something along those lines though and the Afflecks are all like. "Yeah….thanks, we'll definitely keep it in mind!"  which translates to "STAY AWAY FROM MY CHILD YOU THETAN!" But Ben totally calls back later to see if there's any chance of a Cruise massage. Just kidding he loves Jennifer and I refuse to take that away from the world. We need it.

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