One step forward and 10 steps back.
Oh Britney, How many times can I let you back in after banishing you from my bruised heart? How much longer can I keep hoping for better and then only get worse? Why, Britney, WHY?
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As many of us who are up to our current affairs on important things will know, Britney Spears has had a kind of re-invention, a step towards the hot Britney we all knew and loved, the one who gyrated all over a giant can of Pepsi and gave Bob Dole an erection like the classy girl she is. However, as this above image shows, trailer trash Britney is not going easily, Britney is having a tough time making the transition from redneck to raunchy. You can’t blame her, those cheetos stay in your system for a while!
But to aide her in her transition, I’ve taken a recent image of Britney and I’ve given some kind pointers.
1. The Hair Extensions must burn.
I have never worn hair extensions, but thats because I’m generally not to keen on looking like shit. Britney has some of the nastiest hair extensions i’ve seen here, infact Hottie could probably give the bitch some tips on how to rock that weave. The horse-hair must go, Britney.
2. No no @ satin shirts.
I am not the most fashionable of people, but one thing I do know is that I should never go near satin. Not because I don’t like satin, I actually masturbate into sheets of satin, but because when I wear satin I suddenly start looking a lot like Star Jones. It is not a good look, Britney, and unless your on a diet of rice fresh from the marshy fields and you have some life savings to burn then I don’t recommend $5 satin shirts at all.
3. Definitely no no @ satin pants.
Satin pants are kind of like satan in that no one is flattered by them whatsoever. You don’t hear satan flattering anyone either, do you? I didn’t even know that a fashion designer would actually make satin pants; but they probably don’t, which brings me to my next point - Britney, stop making your own clothes.
4. Do not shop in the under 15’s section
We know you are small ho, but we should also point out that clothes in the under 15s sections are supposed to be for people under the age of 15, and not over the age of 20. So whilst your shoes might look good in a 1998 classroom danceoff, they are not so hot for a night out in Vegas.
5. AVOID PARIS HILTON AT ALL COSTS.
What the FUCK are you doing Spears? Seriously now, WHAT IS THIS? WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO YOU? HAVE YOU BEEN AROUND HUMAN WASTE FOR SO LONG THAT YOU CAN’T SMELL THAT THIS BITCH IS ROTTEN? STAY AWAY. AVOID. CEASE AND DESIST.
Cease
and
desist!
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To all LA Deli guests, have a great Holiday season. Thank you for all of your support.
I couldn’t agree more.
Paris Hilton is to much of a partier for Britney. Britney should be home with her kids or else she’ll loose custody of her kids.
ouch!
so what did Paris ever do to you anyway? yeah, so she’s a party animal big deal!! ease on up would you.. get a life already, what is she, spending your money???
tah!
signed BUMMED BY YOU..
wtf seriously not all pp lthat have extensions look bad **rolls eyes** course hottie looks like shit but seriously fucking beyonce and tyra wear hair extensionsand they look hella tight britneys deadand is obvs trying to make somekind of comeback i bet paris and them feel bad forher ass so there being nice but we all know britney wont be as “sexy” as she was when she wasa supposed virgin whatshe needa do is sit her ass down with her babiesand stop droppin them on they heads before they end up like there dad altho its prob non avoidable